An Open Letter To The Sandman.

Dear Sandman,

Hey there. It's me. Eimer. Do you remember me? If not, let me refresh your memory.

When I was a kid in Martins Ferry, Ohio, almost every night I would see you creep into my room with that purple Crown Royal bag filled with sleeping sand.

But, before I could open my eyes and say "Gotcha", you would do your magic and dump a couple loads onto my eyelids. I would be in la-la land for eight to ten hours every single night.

Not a care in the world.

I'm not sure if you remember or not but, on Christmas Eve night in 1979, I left some cookies and milk right next to Santa Claus' dish for you to eat. Remember that?

Yeah, that was me. I'm not sure how many other kids would've go the extra mile for you like I did. Huh?

Then came high school and college. Man, you must have been working overtime with the sand. I remember logging, on average, 12-hour sleeps almost every night. I even missed some classes because of your work.

It was around this time Metallica sang a song praising your work. I really enjoyed that song. No. No, really. I did. Sometimes I hear it on the radio and think about the good ol' days between us.

They were pretty crazy times weren't they?

Then, after college, you would continue to dump the fairy dust. Thanks to my good-old alarm clock, I was able to wake-up, rub the sand from my eyes and get to work on time. And I never did thank-you for helping me out on those drug- and alcohol- fueled weekends. I really needed to get some sleep and you came through in the clutch.

Good times. Good times. It reminds me of the lyrics to the song Oh La La by The Faces.

"I wish that I knew what I know now, When I was younger."

Sigh.

Which brings me to the reason I'm writing you. It's been a couple years since I've seen you around at night on a consistent basis.

Oh sure, maybe you've stopped by to sprinkle a couple specks on my eyelids now and again. But not like you used to.

Now, it seems like I'm waking up every two or three hours.

I guess what I'm saying is I'm missing the sand, man. I'm missing the sand.

And don't think I haven't seen you tip-toeing around the house dropping sand on my two-year old daughter's eyes. I've even seen you drop a couple specks on my wife-to-be's as well.

But not mine. And, for some strange reason, you've been missing my 5-month old son too. What's up with that?

Did I do something to upset you? Are you running out of magic sand? Do you need some help? I can pay you. Seriously, it's not much. But, I can pay you.

I guess I'm just asking that when you fly through Bath, Ohio, tonight; could you please make sure to bring a couple extra bags of that special magic sand. Because I'm in dire need of a good night's rest.

Oh, and just a reminder to drop a couple extra loads on my son's eyes as well? He really needs it.

Well that's about it. Thanks for all your hard work thus far.

Anxiously awaiting your visit and thanking you in advance,

Eimer

P.S. Down the line, if you need a break I would be willing to help you out on a couple midnight sleep runs. Pro bono, of course. For all the great work you've done for me (remember Spring Break 1993?), I could never bring it upon myself to send you an invoice.

Sketchbook - February 27

A Canadian Created Basketball?

About six years ago, I was driving through Ontario on my way home from a week-long camping trip with a group of friends.

On our way to the United States border via Buffalo, my buddy and I (lets call him Craig) drove through this small Canadian township.

That's when something peculiar caught my eye.

Everywhere I turned I saw the name Naismith.

On signs. On billboards. In the air. Everywhere.

Naismith Avenue. Naismith Deli. Naismith Road. Naismith High School. Naismith Retirement Center. Naismith Creek. Naismith Savings and Loan.

You get the idea.

"What's the deal with Naismith?" I asked my buddy in my best Seinfeld impression.

Then I started to brainstorm.

"Maybe he cured some terrible Canadian disease? Maybe he was a kick-ass prime minister of Canada back in the day? Maybe he circumnavigated the globe in a hot-air balloon emblazoned with a maple leaf?"

"I'm not too sure," said my buddy as he took a big, long drag from his Marlboro Light and exhaled out the window. "But I think he invented basketball."

"Pfffft, you and your stupid Master's degree don't know anything" I said. "Why don't you just concentrate on the road and let me do the thinking."

We then, drove out of the Naismith town and pulled into the Kentucky Fried Chicken for lunch.

I think it was the moment that I took my first bite of my KFC poutine, that I completely put the name Naismith out of my mind.

Until now.

As it turns out, my good buddy Craig was right on the money. James Naismith did, in fact, create the sport of basketball.

A white boy? From Canada? Created hoops?

I shit you not!

Click here for the full Wikipedia article on Naismith.

And here's a feature on Naismith from the Basketball Hall of Fame.

Now you've got a little piece of trivia to tell your friends.

The Oscars Kicked My Ass.

So there I was on Saturday afternoon sipping a beer at Holiday Valley Ski Resort minding my own business when this gruff-looking guy pulled up a stool next to me and ordered a draft.

We exchanged pleasantries.

He asked me where I was from. I said Cleveland. Then we talked about the big Cavs trade. The upcoming Browns season. Blah. Blah. Blah. Sports. Blah. Blah. Blah.

The conversation hit a lull. And that's when I piped up with my question of the day.

"Soooo, who do you think will win Best Picture tomorrow?"

He stopped mid-drink and looked over at me.

"Best Picture for what?" he asked.

"You know, the Academy Awards" I responded. "The Oscars? Motion Pictures? Movies?"

He paused for what seemed to be an eternity.

"The Academy Awards?" he asked to no one in particular. "Ain't that, like, the Superbowl for Queers?"

"Hmm," I said to my redneck friend. "I really never thought of it that way."

Well, I'm not really sure if the Oscars are, in fact, the Superbowl for Queers; but this movie-loving straight man had a great time watching it last night.

So what was my final tally from last Thursday's predictions....

12 Correct. 12 Wrong.

Yikes, I've got to get to the theater more often!

A couple 'Oscar shockers' (You know, two in the pink one in the stink?):

- Tilda Swinton for Best Supporting Actress. (Not sure if anyone saw this coming. And if you say you did, you're lying.)

- La Vie En Rose (Two surprise wins for this French movie including Best Make-up and Actress)

- Roger Deakins not winning a Best Cinematography Oscar. (Although I'm sure There Will Be Blood is beautiful, Deakins was nominated twice in this category.)

- Visual Effects (I was convinced they'd give it to Transformers. Now, I've got to join the ranks of the satanic heathens and check out The Golden Compass.)

Well, now that the Oscars are over, it's time to concentrate on shitty movies until the fourth installment of Indiana Jones, the Kentucky Derby, NCAA basketball and March Madness!

Plenty of Awards for Old Men

I can live without the Grammys, the Tonys and the Emmys, but I love to watch the Academy Awards.

That said, even though I haven't seen most of the nominated films, I'm going with my gut and giving you my picks for the 2008 Academy Awards (in no particular order):

Best Actor - Daniel Day Lewis (There Will Be Blood)
(I could see the academy giving it to Johnny Depp, but it seems Lewis' performance is too good. Too nasty.)

Best Supporting Actor - Javier Bardem (No Country For Old Men)
(Perhaps the Academy thought they slighted Holbrook for his awesome work in Creepshow and are giving him the sympathy award for INTO THE WILD. But those who have seen No Country are in awe of Bardem's evil performance)

Best Actress - Julie Christie (Away From Her)

Best Supporting Actress - Cate Blanchett (I'm Not There)
(A lot of people are picking Amy Ryan, but I hear Blanchett was spot-on as Bob Dylan. This is my upset special)

Animated Feature - Ratatouille
(Had Ratatouille not been made this year, I would have put my money on Persepolis. But, in my opinion, Ratatouille should have been a Best Picture nominee. No kidding)

Art Direction - Sweeney Todd

Cinematography - The Assassination of Jesse James
(Roger Deakins is nominated twice in this category for No Country For Old Men. I'm 100% positive he's walking away with a statue on Sunday. Choose your poison. Although I thought Jesse James was a beautiful pic.)

Costume Design - Sweeney Todd
(When it comes to costume design and art direction always bet on black, er, I mean Tim Burton)

Directing - The Coen Brothers
(I wouldn't be surprised if the Academy pulled the ol' Saving Private Ryan and gave the directing award to PTA and best movie to No Country)

Documentary Feature - No End in Sight
(Sicko and Taxi to the Dark Side could sneak in, but i thought No End In Sight was one of the best documentaries I've seen in quite some time.)

Documentary Short - La Corona
(A wild guess)

Film Editing - The Bourne Ultimatum
(I have never lost the best editing category.)

Foreign Language Film - Mongol
(A lot of people, i.e. movie geeks, are eating this movie up. Here's the trailer.)

Makeup - Norbit
(I hated the movie, but the make-up was well done. Pirates already won and, after watching the trailer, I can't imagine what La Vie En Rose did that was so freaking great.)

Original Score - Ratatouille
(Like I said, best picture nominee and the score was french and fun.)

Original Song - "Falling Slowly" from Once
(This is the lock pick of the night.)

Short Film, Animated - Peter & the Wolf
(Click here to see why I chose it. Although, I wouldn't be surprised if Madame Tutli-Putli won too. Check out the wierdness right here.)

Short Film, Live Action -The Substitute

Sound Editing - The Bourne Ultimatum
(Just a hunch.)

Sound Mixing - Ratatouille

(Music, sound effects and voices come together for a great film)

Visual Effects - Transformers
(I heard The Golden Compass creatures were pretty good, but the Transformer robots weren't too shabby either.)

Adapted Screenplay - Joel and Ethan Coen for No Country For Old Men
(How can you not pick the screenplay with the screwed up WTF ending?)

Original Screenplay - Diablo Cody for Juno
(I'm hearing good word on The Savages, but I just can't see NOT giving Juno's Diablo something. I mean, she's a former stripper, which gives hope to anyone that wants to break it in the movie biz.)

Best Picture - No Country For Old Men
(Any other year, There Will Be Blood would have swept the Academy Awards. It's been said the Coen Brothers have directed what may be considered the next Citizen Kane.)

Well there you have it. What do you think about the picks. Do you even care? I'll give you my tally on Monday.

10 Great Film Endings Set To Fantastic Music.

I just finished watching King of California yesterday. It's a good movie with fine acting by Michael Douglas and Evan Rachel Wood.

The final scene, which segues into the end credits, played to the song "California Stars" by Billy Bragg and Wilco pretty much summed up the entire film experience for me.

In my opinion, the final song in a movie can represent a film's entire soul.

Then, started to think about some other great films with spectacular final scenes set to great music.

Off the top of my head, here are ten great examples:

PULP FICTION
The Lively Ones' Surf Rider kicks in as Jules and Vincent exit the diner in flip flops and dorky t-shirts.



FIGHT CLUB
The Pixies' Where is My Mind brings it all together as buildings crumble while Marla Singer and Tyler Durden's alter-ego hold hands and contemplate their future.



THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT MARY
The Farrelly Brothers and the rest of the cast ham it up with Build Me Up Buttercup from The Foundations.



THE SHINING
As Jack's fate is sealed in the hedge maze, Kubrick tosses in one more red herring with a cut to the hotel and a slow camera pan to a small portrait of New Year's revelers (with a surprise guest!) circa 1921 set to the eerie music of Midnight With The Stars and You performed by the Ray Noble Band.



THE MATRIX
Had there not been any sequels, this ending set to Rage Against The Machine's Wake Up would have went down as one of the all-time best. It completely sets the tone of the entire experience.


THE BREAKFAST CLUB
As Principal Vernon finishes raeading Brian's hope-filled prose summing up a long day of Saturday detention, on the football field John Bender raises his arms in the air and The Simple Minds' Don't You Forget About Me kicks in.
Click here to listen to Anthony Michael Hall's Breakfast Club prose.


TRUE ROMANCE
After going to hell and back, Alabama, her husband (minus one eye) and son are sitting beside a sunny beach. While we listen to her narration, our ears are dabbled with Hans Zimmer's feel-good score You're So Cool. Perhaps Tony Scott was foreshadowing a happy ending throughout the film with this musical choice?
Click here to listen to You're So Cool.


STAND BY ME
As an older Gordie Lachance (played by Richard Dreyfuss) types in the final sentence to his coming-of-age novel, Ben E. King's Stand By Me begins and the credits roll.


DONNIE DARKO
The viewer is taken on a journey of all the main characters while Gary Jules performs the Tears for Fears hit Mad World in this striking end sequence.

CLOSER
In this beautiful end sequence set to The Blower's Daughter by Damien Rice, Natalie Portman walks the streets of New York City to many rubbernecking males while, in London, Dan finally realizes the true identity of Alice Ayres.


I'm curious, what's your favorite? Are there any that I missed?

In 19 days, something wonderful happens.

I don't usually give our current President too many kudos.

But three years ago, Ol' Georgey did something that I wholeheartedly applaud him for.

On August 8, 2005, he signed the Energy Policy Act of 2005.

In addition to doing a number of important energy conservation things for the United States, the act also changed our Daylight Saving Time dates.

Beginning in 2007, DST began on the second Sunday of March (instead of the first Sunday of April) and ended the first Sunday of November (instead of the last Sunday of October).

Simply put, on March 9, 2008, we're going to 'Spring Forward' and get an extra hour of sunlight.

Waaaaaay back in November, I wrote about how much I loathed Daylight Saving Time and the winter months.

It's hard to believe that daylight after work is almost upon us.

On a personal note this is huge for me because it signifies the impending end of the winter doldrums.

I can finally exercise outside after the kids are asleep without wearing a headlamp and orange vest while I'm running on the road.

And, more importantly, the cell door to our five-month prison sentence will finally be lifted and the kids (including myself) can run free outside like a pack of wild jackals.

And lets not forget that the sun plays a very important role in the formation of vitamin D for our body, which is necessary for the general well being and strength of our bones.

And it also maintains the general health of our skin and acts like a natural disinfectant for our body.

Oh yeah, it also causes skin cancer.

But who cares!! In this guy's mind, we are only 19 days from the world truly becoming a better place....

...at least in the Eimer household.

A cartoon called FUCK

(CLICK TO ENLARGE)

Cartooning: The Most Deadliest Career

I always knew you could piss off a lot of people with a well-drawn, witty cartoon.

But who knew, you could get assassinated for it?

Yesterday, I came across this article concerning the arrest of three people who are suspected of plotting to kill one of the 12 cartoonists who drew political cartoons poking fun at the Prophet Muhammad.

Cartoonist Kurt Westergaard, 73, and his wife Gitte, 66, have been living under police protection because of this cartoon:


According to Islamic law, any depiction of the prophet Muhammed, even favorable, is looked down upon in the Muslim community. To some, it's even grounds for execution.

I'm sure Salman Rushdie can definitely sympathize with this guy.

I picture Westergaard and his wife in an old VW with a carload of Muslim extremists firing AK-47's at their vehicle. As Westergaard's wife fires off a bazooka toward the Muslim car, Westergaard is in the back seat (with his flak jacket on) dodging bullets and giddily drawing cartoons of the prophet Muhammed. All the while, attempting to make tomorrow's newspaper deadline.

"Hold 'em off honey," he yells to his wife as she pulls out a grenade, pulls the pin out with her mouth and tosses it out of the car. "I've got some cross-hatching to do!"

Eat your heart out Jason Bourne.

Talk to any political cartoonist, and they'll tell you that they appreciate the hate mail more than the praise mail.

In an odd sort of way, it makes them feel like they're doing their job.

In my opinion, it's even a bonus to raise the ire of an entire community. It's even cooler to get them so pissed off that they won't rest until your severed head is on a platter. That's a political cartoonist's wet dream.

Think about it. All this hubbub over a couple doodles placed on a piece of paper with a pen and ink.

Behold the awesome power of political cartoons!

Cormac McCarthy's Oprah Interview.

I was perusing YouTube and came across Oprah Winfrey's interview with famed author Cormac McCarthy concerning his novel The Road, which Oprah picked for her book club.

It's a great interview. And the person who uploaded it, blocked the interview off into seven different sections. I've set them up for you just in case you don't have the time to view them all.

From what I understand, he doesn't give too many interviews or speeches. So having an hour-long interview into his insights was looked upon as a 'gift' to many people in the writing community. Some people say that Oprah did a terrible job. Personally, I think she did fine. Just like her interview with Wacko Jacko, she asked some tough questions interspersed with some easy, light-hearted ones.

However, she does seem to hang onto the money thing a bit. In Part Two, McCarthy talks about not needing money. Never wanting money. And not wanting to work, ever. I think if you were at a cocktail party or something in the United States and you told someone this, people would spit their martini in your face. You'd be looked upon as a lazy-ass hippy. And considering Oprah is a billionaire who clawed and scratched her way to the top, I'm sure she would be fascinated by this type of mindset.

One thing, I was surprised they didn't talk about the No Country For Old Men film too much. However, this segment is about Cormac and The Road. So I guess it's understandable.

In any event, this is the type of guy I'd like to hang out and have a beer with. He seems down to Earth and a bit shy. But, I'm sure he'd have a lot of great stories to tell about his craft and his life.

CLICK HERE FOR PART ONE, which introduces McCarthy and talks briefly about how he came up with the idea for THE ROAD.

CLICK HERE FOR PART TWO, which gives insight into McCarthy's views on being poor, living life and not working for the man.

PART THREE MUST HAVE BEEN DELETED.

CLICK HERE FOR PART FOUR, which gives insight into the writing craft, being successful and money.

CLICK HERE FOR PART FIVE, which talks about his writing style (no punctuation, lack of commas, etc.).

CLICK HERE FOR PART SIX. McCarthy talks about the Santa Fe Institute and all of the brainiacs he gets to talk to on a daily basis.

CLICK HERE FOR PART SEVEN. Subconscious writing and further discussion of The Road.

When Good News is sometimes Bad News.

The reason this site is called EimerDebris is, well, because my last name is Eimer. I've also been called Eimer all my life, among other things.

Another reason I go by Eimer is I'm not really too sure I want the whole world to know my whole name, yet.

Eventually, I'm going to start a website with my name, resume, etc. I'll also link to two other sites: my eventual cartoon website (where I'll sell stuff) and this blog (where I'll write about selling stuff).

On a whim, I typed in my name on Yahoo.com to see what would come up. I was shocked to find that, out of more than 45,000 possible entries, this blog tops the list.

I think it has something to do with; (A.) My primary e-mail is Yahoo based and (B.) I'm a current member of Flickr , an online photo-sharing community, and have my blog address posted on that site - which is currenlty owned by Yahoo.

However, when I type in my name on Google, this site doesn't come up at all. Which is weird in its own little way.

So what do I think?

In a way I think it's cool. If people are looking for me and type in my name, they'll come across this blog and can find out what I've been up to.

In another way I think it sucks. If people are looking for me and type in my name, they'll come across this blog and can find out what I've been up to.

I guess I started this blog to have a place where my friends could go and find out what I'm thinking about, what movies I'm seeing and what cartoons I've been drawing, etc. without sending out mass e-mails all the time.

On the other side of the coin, possible clients, even current associates, could find this blog by plopping in my name. Some may not like what they see. Others may like it. Some may just go 'meh'.

I'm in a creative field, so I really doubt that I could ever get fired. But who knows?

If I was selling something - say t-shirts of my cartoons, or prints or some sort of service - I would be ecstatic that this site was first on the search list. I mean, people pay big money for that type of play.

For now, I guess I'm just OK with it.

That said, I think it's important to have as little inhibition as possible when writing, painting, drawing, acting, doing stand-up, making a film etc.

So keep tuning in. I'm not going to change. Hell, I may even get a little more controversial.

Fuck it, eh? You only live once.

What's HAPPENING M. Night Shyamalan?

Hey there, just came across the movie trailer for M. Night Shyamalan's new flick The Happening due in theaters this June. Check it out right here:



Doesn't look too shabby. Reminds me of two Stephen King books Cell and The Stand mixed with some sort of Jesus-themed Armageddon type shit. It even seems like this movie could probably serve as a prequel to Cormac McCarthy's The Road.

Harry Knowles of Aint-It-Cool-News raved about The Happening screenplay in an older post. However, keep in mind that Knowles' geek-love of directors, movies and screenplays has sometimes gotten in the way of obvious bad work.

But, knowing that crazy Shamalamadingdong, I'm sure there will be some sort of crazy twist ending.

Speaking of twist endings, it seems like all of his movies have sort of hit a downhill slant on the 'coolness' factor after his first two major films; The Sixth Sense and Unbreakable.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed Signs and The Village. I thought they were both great ideas. However, I think he was trying too hard to put his patented crazy, twist ending into those films. I mean, The Village had almost three different possible twist endings to choose from even before the movie ended.

To add to that, there's been rumors that he stole the idea for The Village from the novel Running Out of Time by Margaret Peterson Haddix.

That said, I'm happy to see him back in the drama game after the horrific The Lady in the Water. That movie sucked so bad, my penis hurt after watching it.

So, I'm curious, what do you guys think about M. Night and the new trailer?

Holy Fucking Shit. Panera Bread is Closed.

So there I was. Staring aimlessly at my flattop reading the various headlines on CNN.com:

- A female terrorist blew herself up in a crowded market in Jerusalem.

- A baby was put into a microwave oven and internally baked by his drunk mother.

- As it turns out, Heath Ledger was a great father.

"Did you hear?"

Those three words rattled my brain and awoke me up from my internet coma.

I looked up from the devastation on my screen. It was one of our account execs. Her face was red and she wasn't too happy. In fact, she looked kind of flustered and sad.

"Ummm, no," I said unsure where this conversation was going. "Did someone from Saturday Night Live die?"

"Worse," she huffed and puffed. "They closed the Panera Bread downstairs. Can you even believe it?"

"Uhhhh, no?"

And with that, she took off, sauntered up to another office and began the whole exchange all over again.

"Did you hear?"

Panera Bread was closed.

No more Asian Sesame Chicken Salad.

No more Asiago Roast Beef sandwiches.

No more Low-fat Chicken Noodle Soup.

No more french baguettes.

"No more baguettes?" I silently cursed to the lord. "Why have you forsaken me!"

Word about the closing quickly spread through the office like a Southern California wildfire.

"I can't believe it," one production assistant yelped while I was getting a cup of coffee. "It seemed like it was always packed during lunch."

"The four-cheese souffle was out of this world," said the designer talking on a cellphone. "And the coffee and pastries weren't bad either."

"I just don't understand," said the VP of Marketing in the bathroom. "I really enjoyed those baguettes."

Before lunch, I went to a meeting. As I walked into the room, people were whispering and shaking their heads in disbelief.

"What are you guys talking about?" I asked as I plopped down in the chair. "Did the other guy from Brokeback Mountain die?"

Uncomfortable silence followed.

"We were just talking about the Panera Bread closing downstairs," my boss chirped up. "It's shocking. Simply shocking."

I silently groaned.

During lunch, everyone had their own way to grieve the demise of the downstairs Panera Bread.

Some people went to Charlie's Steakery for a Steak sandwich. Others dropped by the Hard Rock Cafe for a burger and fries. Some went to Subway, ordered a half turkey sub on wheat, returned to their cubicles, and digested their meals alone.

No more freshly baked breads, bagels and spreads.

No more hand-tossed salads.

No more pepperoni crispani.

No more french baguettes.

Sigh.

On this particular day, I opted for a chinese lunch in the food court.

As I walked up to place my order, I noticed the cute girl from accounting standing in line.

She looked over at me and whispered "Did you hear about Panera."

I nodded and gave a somber look. I may have even stuck out my bottom lip.

"It's crazy," she said shaking her head as she boxed up her Teryaki Chicken with vegetables and brown rice. "Can you really believe that Panera Bread is actually closed?"

Sadly, I could believe it.

After eating my Moo Goo Gai Pan and Sprite, I headed back to the office.

As I hopped in the elevator, the CEO and President of my company walked in.

"Hi," I said.

"Hello," he said as the elevator doors closed.

This was my chance to make small talk with the Big Kahuna.

I searched and searched my brain databanks for something to say.

Should I mention the new account we just landed?
Should I ask him what he thought about Microsoft purchasing Yahoo?
Should I mention politics and the upcoming Super Tuesday primary?

As the bright light flashed from floor to floor, I decided to throw in the towel. I couldn't think of anything worthwile to say. My one-on-one chance with the big cheese was blown.

Suddenly, he turned towards me with this sad, puppy-dog look on his face.

"So," he said. "Did you hear Panera Bread closed?"

What's Up Patriots Fan?

You've got to wonder what was going through this guy's mind after the clock hit :01 last night.

I'm thinking "Fuck. Now I have to walk out of the stadium looking like this."

Come to think of it, I think it would be a great reality series to follow hard-core NFL fans as they prepare for a Sunday game from morning to night. I'm thinking one hour episodes focusing on one fan per team with HBO producing. I'd definitely tune in.

That said, in addition to the Rams/Titans match-up in 2000, that was best fourth quarter Superbowl action I've ever seen (or can remember) in my 35 years. It reminded me of the final Buckeyes touchdown drive against a cocky Arizona State in the 1997 Rose Bowl. Or Texas defeating USC for the national championship a few years back.

And what was up with Belichik running off the field before time expired? Can you say "Sore Loser"? I can.