Monday, August 24, 2015

Top Ten 2015 Fall Movies I Would Kill Someone To See



Well, I don't think I would actually kill someone, but just trying to snag some attention from the SEO spider robots out there.

In any event, I like Autumn. Like. But I fucking love Fall Movies. After scanning Rotten Tomatoes, reading Entertainment Weekly and listening to the scuttlebutt around the office (there are a lot of Millennials here), I've compiled a list of my Top Ten Anticipated Movies that myself, and my beer-drinking jacket, will attend.


Oh, haven't I ever told you about my beer-drinking jacket? Well, since most theaters in my area don't serve alcohol, I have this old black pea coat that I've had for about 12 years. But what makes this pea coat extra awesome it that I purposely ripped out the internal seams so I can easily and stealthily fill it with about four or five cold cans of beer. I can pass keenest ticket takers in the industry with this kick-ass jacket. Some may call me an alcoholic. But I look at myself as a precocious, forward thinker.

But, first the (not-really) Autumn (but not-really) Summer Movie I Would Kill to see:

Everest (Sept. 18)
All-star cast. Death and drama during the deadliest night on Earth's highest mountain in 1996 ... maybe I'll take the kids :)

And, here's the the Autumn 2015 list:

The Martian (Oct. 2)
I thought the Andy Weir book was highly enjoyable. I have full confidence that Master Director Ridley Scott will knock this film adaptation out of the park.

Steve Jobs (Oct. 9)
Academy-award winner Danny Boyle works with Michael Fassbender as Jobs in hopes of eclipsing the disappointing 2013 film that starred Asthon Kutcher. Won't be too hard.

Beasts of No Nation (Oct. 16)
The dude who directed the first True Detective. The good one. Cary Fukunaga. Netflix world-wild distribution. Gritty African Civil War. Mercenary Fighters. Sold.

Crimson Peak (Oct. 16)
Like a little freaking fan boy, I always get excited when Guillermo Del Toro gets behind the camera (Hellboy, Pacific Rim, Pan’s Labyrinth) – let alone behind the camera of a horror movie in which he created the story and the screenplay.

Spectre (Nov. 6)
I’m not a big Bond fan. But I’m intrigued by what Academy-Award winning director Sam Mendes (American Beauty, Road to Perdition, Skyfall) and new cinematographer Hoyte Van Hoytema (Interstellar, Le the Right One In, Her) can whip up.

The Good Dinosaur (Nov. 25)
After the success of Inside Out, Pixar goes for a two-fecta in the same year. Trailer looks amazing. Looks like a mixture between Ice Age and Disney’s Dinosaurs, but better.
  

In The Heart of the Sea (Dec. 11)
I’m a sucker for stories involving bodies of water and some sort of disaster and/or crazy creature (i.e. Jaws, Lake Placid, All is Lost, The Perfect Storm) – especially if said film has both a disaster and a crazy creature, and was supposed to be the true inspiration for the book Moby Dick

Star Wars: The Force Awakens (Dec. 18)
Duh.

The Hateful Eight (Dec. 25)
Quentin Tarantino brings Reservoir Dogs to the Wild West. Saddle up!

The Revenant (Dec. 25)
The Academy-Award winning director of Birdman. Leonardo DiCaprio. Kick-ass cinematography. Revenge drama set during 1820. Oh, and a bear attack. Yes, please.

Did I miss any favorites on your list? Well, I don't care. If you see me and my pea coat in full glory at one of the above movies, be sure to tap me on the shoulder for a lukewarm one on me.

See you at the theater!

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