Wednesday, July 11, 2007

Christopher Reeve Pay-Per-View Special

I was riding my bike through the beautiful town of Bath, Ohio, when I came across a pasture of horses. For some reason my mind reverted back to Christopher Reeve and his equestrian mishap, where his horse threw him, Reeve broke his neck and, eventually, died.

In interviews, he always said he wasn't upset at the horse or didn't want to do anything to the horse. I have my doubts. If you put me in the same situation, I would have been pissed off for life at the horse. And, in one way or another, I would get some sort of revenge.

Then I got to thinking.

Wouldn't it have been cool if Christopher Reeve put on a pay-per-view special where he killed the horse live on television? Producers could pimp his wheelchair up with missles, a machine gun and a sharp joust, which he could use to 'finish off' the horse. Then, after the kill, you could make "Official Christopher Reeve horse glue!" and sell it.

I can see the marketing campaign. And it would be fantastic. Posters with Reeve and the horse looking each other in the eye. Contests to see how long the killing would take and let's not forget about T-shirts, hats, baby onesies, motion picture rights. The possibilities would be endless.

Plus, the publicity and build-up for the event could have even rivaled the Superbowl.

ANOTHER PLUS: All the money generated would have gone to stem-cell research, which would be a plus for everyone in the world.

It would have been a win-win situation for everyone invovled. Well, everyone except the horse.

1 comment:

Eric said...

I think it would work. You would need to do some footwork to reduce public sympathy for the horse, though.

Perhaps leak a forged document in which the horse brags that he stopped short so he could see "Superman fly".